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I got an email request to sign a petition










Last night I got an email asking me to sign a petition (if you sign one petition, you will forever be sent these emails asking you to sign others) This one had the subject line "biggest petition for bees EVER," and my mind went in an odd direction:

Many are petitioning for bees, but our petition is surely the biggest. We really, really, really want some bees. We've petitioned three times before unsuccessfully, but this time, we collected signatures all winter. There is no one in a 50 mile radius who hasn't signed our petition. Even babies have signed. Even the newly deceased. We will be delivering our petition to the keeper of the bees tomorrow. It is our sincerest hope that this time, at last, we will be granted bees.


source



Comments

( 16 comments — Leave a comment )
shewhomust
Feb. 23rd, 2017 11:16 am (UTC)
"The keeper of the bees"? But I hope that they are indeed granted bees - they deserve it!
asakiyume
Feb. 23rd, 2017 12:18 pm (UTC)
Maybe instead of "the keeper of the bees," I should say "the bee holder" (the one in whose eyes beauty is! .... don't mind me; I'm just engaging in mindless word play--there's no actual meaning or significance)
sartorias
Feb. 23rd, 2017 12:49 pm (UTC)
That is kind of a head scratcher!
asakiyume
Feb. 23rd, 2017 12:54 pm (UTC)
I wrote this late at night, so I should edit to make it clearer: the thing in blue was the subject line from an email I deleted, a random petition looking for signers. It was a petition to protect bees, but the short-form subject line made it seem, in my mind, like it could be a petition of someone **asking** for bees.
sartorias
Feb. 23rd, 2017 01:26 pm (UTC)
I see! And I haven't had my tea yet, so brain is only partly on line.

There is so much story potential there!
queenoftheskies
Feb. 23rd, 2017 02:02 pm (UTC)
Bees!

There seems to be a petition for everything these days, doesn't there?
asakiyume
Feb. 23rd, 2017 04:43 pm (UTC)
Yes, and a lot of them don't accomplish much. Still, I guess it's a way for people to express how they feel, and *some* of them do accomplish something.
heliopausa
Feb. 23rd, 2017 02:04 pm (UTC)
:)

(And goes to show the
a) flexibility
or
b) annoying difficulty
of the English language. )
asakiyume
Feb. 23rd, 2017 04:44 pm (UTC)
:D both, for sure.
deborahjross
Feb. 23rd, 2017 07:37 pm (UTC)
LOL!
oiktirmos
Feb. 23rd, 2017 08:07 pm (UTC)
Even babies have signed. Even the newly deceased
Such enthusiasm!

Fame is a bee.
It has a song –
It has a sting –
Ah, too, it has a wing.

Emily Dickinson
asakiyume
Feb. 24th, 2017 03:47 am (UTC)
Emily Dickinson is *so good*

The newly deceased like bees because the sound of them buzzing brings warmth to their ghostly bones, and when it's ashes to ashes and dust to dust, pollen is the best dust--it's honey and perfume all in one.
amaebi
Feb. 24th, 2017 12:13 am (UTC)
Wow, on first read I also thought it was use of a petition site by a deranged person.
asakiyume
Feb. 24th, 2017 03:52 am (UTC)
Yeah, I'm laughing in some embarrassment--this was sort of an uncanny valley of ... jokes? I'm not even sure what it was I was doing. Petitions for bees are really petitions to protect and support them, but I couldn't help thinking of the petitions as being desirous OF bees.
amaebi
Feb. 24th, 2017 04:07 am (UTC)
Well, I enjoyed it both ways.
asakiyume
Feb. 24th, 2017 04:10 am (UTC)
Very glad!
( 16 comments — Leave a comment )

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